Funny things the John Q. Public say while at the Post Office.

     

  • After just passing two big blue mail boxes outside and walking past the mail slot in the lobby John holds up his letters and says "Where do I mail these?"            Duh!
  • In 1997 the Post Office came out with self adhesive stamps.  Check out the names John uses for these.
  • Self licked
  • Self adhering
  • Already licked
  • You lick ems'
  • Those things
  • John comes into the Post Office and he obviously drove because he sets his car keys on the counter.  When told that his transaction involves his reading a form he says "I can't read that I don't have my glasses".   Would you like to be driving on the streets with this man.
  • John goes on vacation and fills in the proper form to hold his mail while away.  In the box marked resume delivery on (date) he enters his date.  His carrier takes the mail out of the building on that date and sure enough here comes John wanting to pick up his mail. Duh!
  • John is expecting his SSI check and he comes to the counter.  When asked where it is mailed John says I don't know.  Duh!
  • John comes in with a wire coat hanger around his neck (we all wonder if he is trying to hang his self).  "Could you lend me some money til my check comes in?"   What do we look like a bank for crazy people?
  • John comes to the counter and asks for a $700.00 Money order then proceeds to pull one dollar bills from every pocket in his outfit. The ones are every direction and upside down mixed.  Not wanting to take his word for it I then have to face the ones and count them before making a whole 85 cents on the transaction.
  • John comes up to the counter asking about the commemorative stamps in our display then asks. "How can I get my picture on a stamp?"  I proceed to tell him that all of the folks on stamps have been dead for a while and that it not be in his best interest to be on a stamp.  He then continues to ask, "Who do I send my request to? How long will it take? If I get all of my friends to send in post cards will I be selected?"
  • John appears to have two rolls of stamps in his hand as he approaches the counter.  He then sets the rolls on the counter and they look like he sat on then when he got into his car.  Still coiled up and within the clear casing only smashed.  John says " Could you give me two fresh rolls?"   I said there was nothing wrong with the ones he has since they were self adhesive and would still stick and lay flat.  Seeing that he would not give up I gave him the swap.  Would anyone out there like to buy some smashed rolls of stamps?
  • John comes up to the counter and asks for a phone book, then begins circling names and making notes in the margins.  He then takes the phone book with him as he leaves only to continue in the outer lobby. John then proceeds to walk out with my phone book.
  • John ask for his check (he knows that its here because the government gives them to us early to distribute)  We ask where he gets delivery, John says "In California".   At this point one of the window clerks who worked the day before tells me that John just mailed his change of address card to California the day before. Duh!